2.21.2017
It wasn't the way her thoughts were flying all over the place that showed Diana something was very wrong. When she awoke, it was always that way. There was that slight pricking along her skin, the start of the madness that would over take every Amazon when their bracelets were removed. Aphrodite's Doom, the price they had paid for her mother's mistakes in succumbing to Hercules lies and her aunt's disobedience in attempting to rescue her people. All knew that the bracelets of iron that all Amazons wore were symbols of their imprisonment and how they were to no longer believe the lies of men. But there was another, less known punishment woven into them.
For an Amazon to have her bracelets taken from her was to ensure falling into madness.
Diana had never known this as a child and had never seen it for herself until just before she had won the tournament and left Themyscira for Patriarch's World--it has been terrifying to her, seeing the woman acting like a beast, tearing at her raiment, her own skin, lashing out at the healers until they had been able to hold her down and get her bracelets back around her wrists. She had only wanted to feel the water and wind on her skin with no barriers, she had sobbed out under the glowing light of the Purple ray of Healing. Diana had never seen such a thing, and she never wanted to see it again.
She wanted to claw her way out of her own skin. She didn't knew why she was hearing so many voices, why it felt like everything was wrong. She was weak, no strength, no wisdom, no lasso, no bracelets, nothing. Nothing she knew except the punishment that she had to bear for crimes she had never committed. Clothes she found constricting and unwearable. Claws that cut through anything that she didn't want lon her hands.
She tried to us Deanna's breathing exercises to calm herself, to try and bring order to the maelstrom in her mind, but it didn't work she was too twitchy, too everything.
She found who had her things, her items and she was insolent and rude, treating them like party favors and toys--
Di, come on, that isn't gonna help.
It was rare that Deanna tried to intervene with her but she wasn't in the mood--she wasn't able to hear her. She didn't want to hear her. She wanted to stop the voices in her head, all the rude comments and annoying complaints, the strange way that one second everything went her way and the next every bad thing she could think of went on around her.
It drove her out of the residence, climbing walls. In a literal sense. It surprised her, enough for her inner 'being' to push her off the brick wall, the glittering claws on her fingers catching her attention.
Are you done being a dick, Diana? Cause seriously, you're being a dick. You don't have your stuff OK, get past it, that's what we're supposed to do.
"I don't know I don't know--" She didn't know if the voice was inside or outside of her head anymore, she didn't know what was happening anymore--
She didn't know how she found her way home, what 'home' was anymore. She didn't want to listen to this voice of reason trying to tell her to be better than 'this'.
